sunday

i could mislead you here and tell you what a lovely sunday afternoon we had at the beach. looks nice doesn't it?

 but sometimes photos don't tell the whole story.

today, i was feeling very flat. i have been distracting myself of late...  distracting myself from the fact that jess and i are on our own, as alistair has once again headed off to work overseas after only a few short weeks at home... distracting myself from the inevitable feelings of being far away from a loved one.

we were fortunate to have my mother and father in law stay with us for a few days after alistair left. as we fare welled them this morning, to continue on with their travels to the west, i felt an emptiness creep in. i always feel this way whenever anyone that's been staying leaves.

the grey clouds of the morning reflected my mood back to me. 'come on sunshine' i kept thinking, 'come out and cheer me up'.

i felt impatient, short tempered and unsympathetic towards jessica. i was not being my best self.

a walk was what i needed. space to just be.

so off to the beach we went with our afternoon tea and the sun finally shone. it was lovely. i love doing this with my girl and she loves it too.

but it didn't really get me out of the self pitying mood i was in. i just wanted to take photos (and took many). i didn't feel like playing. jess got quite annoyed with this. she couldn't work out whether to have shoes on or off, socks on or off, whether we should build a sandcastle or run along the beach. she was frustrating me and i was frustrating her. tears had to be averted many times. the two year old was coming out in us both.

and that is what the photos don't tell you.

it is hard this life that we live with alistair working away for long periods of time. it is just the way we live. the days like today are the worst, when i can't jimmy myself out of a bad mood, when i am not being my best self.

acknowledging that fact helps.

taking a break

i have been a little absent from this space over the last week or so.

the days have been full. so many gardening projects to complete, food to prepare and cook and a really good book have been keeping me away from the computer.

the house is a mess, there is a pile of washing waiting to be folded on the chair in the lounge again, more in the basket waiting to be washed but we have been eating very well and the garden is looking great so all is not lost.

i am planning to take a short break from blogging mainly so i don't put pressure on myself to be here over the next week or so. i have a few things i need to catch up on and things are going to be hectic for the next few days.

 i will be return soon.

oh sourdough!

sourdough!

i go from one success to two failures. so happy when it works... so not when it doesn't. not sure where i am going so wrong. 

i have made many loaves now using the no knead recipe from the nourished kitchen blog. sometimes edible but often it ends up as chicken food before we have eaten the whole loaf. i liked this recipe, which i posted about here, as it makes very little mess but i got frustrated with the failures so i put the starter culture into hibernation while i got my head around the process a bit more.

while surfing the net the other day i came across a recipe for malted wheat and honey sourdough. sounded delicious and easy so i thought i would give it a go (i didn't have malted wheat flour so used wholemeal wheat flour). i followed a couple more links and learnt a bit more about sourdough, gained a bit more confidence. yes i can be a sourdough baker!

the first loaf (pictured above) turned out fantastic, i could've eaten the whole thing myself. happy happy!

the next two loaves just didn't work. 

back to the drawing board.

i think i need lessons from someone in the know don't you think? or a warmer house? 

or both!

in the garden

i have been spending plenty of time out in the garden over the past week.

planting, mulching, feeding, harvesting and more planting. not to mention the never ending weeding.

i am finding there is so much to do before the warm weather sets in. i know its only august, technically still winter, but in this part of the world spring can come around too soon (for me anyway) and it can be extremely warm.

i picked these beautiful beets and carrots a few days ago and made them into lacto fermented beets and lacto fermented ginger carrots.

not sure how they taste just yet, the beetroot will be ready tomorrow and the carrots the day after. i can't wait to try them.

we're not picking too much else other than greens such as spinach, kale, plenty of parsley and small amounts of dandelion and coriander. oh and the odd radish which i have discovered is lovely spread with butter and a sprinkling of salt.

i have many plans for the spring and summer garden although i am wondering where i am going to put everything and how i will keep up with the watering.

being two

there are days in our children's lives when we wish time could stand still (at least just for a little while longer).

today, there were so many times when i wished i had a camera in my hand to capture these moments so i can hold them in my memory forever.

i didn't though so i thought i would write them down instead...

jessica,

 proudly carrying a bucket of grain down to the chicken tractor which was on the lawn and carefully tipping the contents into the little hole at the top. coming back up to the main chicken run the shortest way (although more difficult way) up over the rock wall and across the garden bed.

trying to catch lavender, who is a very big chicken, to give her a cuddle while holding a fist full of feathers to stop her going anywhere.

walking around with her hands in her pockets for most of the day just because she happened to be wearing something with pockets.

standing with one hand in her pocket while holding the garden hose with the other, whilst watering the garden (and herself).

taking her gumboots off and filling them with water!

helping to fold the mountain of washing that had been sitting on a lounge room chair gradually getting taller and taller for the past week, making her own piles on the floor just as i do.

all in an ordinary day of being two.

flowering in the garden

we had a heavy blanket of fog descend upon us this morning.

it was gorgeous outside, i love misty mornings.

as the sun started peaking through and burnt away the remaining fog i snapped a few photos of some of the plants that are flowering in the garden now.

spring is definitely on the way.

this moment...

this moment inspired by soulemama - a friday ritual. a single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. a simple, special, extraordinary moment. a moment I want to pause, savour and remember.